world domination packages

    your path to unlimited control of all circumstances

    world domination packages for every need:

    LIB package

    WWJD package

    PILL package

    MOM package

    ADHD package

    GOP package

    world renowned OOPS package

    venture package:  logo/identity/brand

    typewriter.works

    everything starts with a fantastic logo.  it’s the initial statement of your values, the foundation of everything your company represents.  identity is everything made which displays your logo.  but how do you get a stunningly unique brand?

    GOOD NEWS!  the dr. trentreker Logo Identity Brand (LIB) graphic design package is the preeminent way to awe your industry.  specifically created for new ventures, LIB consists of everything you need to exert authority over your unsuspecting competition.

    importantly, your brand is born from your identity.  branding is the perpetual process of identifying, creating and managing the assets and actions which shape the perception of your company.  a new brand must have time to develop context, and the LIB package is all about context!

    see what i have done in the past and what i can do for you here.

    • LIB RESEARCH AND ANALYSIS

    • LOGO DESIGN AND DEVELOPMENT

    • PRINT COLLATERAL (BUSINESS CARDS, LETTERHEAD, ENVELOPE), WITH SIGNAGE, CLOTHING, PRINT AND DIGITAL/SOCIAL MEDIA ADVERTISING DESIGN AVAILABLE

    • PROMOTIONS CONSULTING, DESIGN AND IMPLEMENTATION

    • PRINTER, WEB HOST AND EMAIL MANAGEMENT

    • WEBSITE DESIGN AND DEVELOPMENT (see below)

    • HELP YOU INTENTIONALLY MAINTAIN AND PROPAGATE YOUR BRAND THROUGH ALL ASPECTS OF YOUR ORGANIZATION

    venture package:  website

    casinoelcamino website homepage 2010
    bikerMetric website design 2012 / world domination in motorcycles

    your website is far more than a place for people to see a menu or buy a thing.  it’s your value in action, a firm digital handshake with a generous smile.  your website must exude the promise of quality and care.  it must look great, work efficiently.

    but where to find web design of the non-mediocre and obtuse kind?  where can you go to begin your path toward world domination?

    GOOD NEWS!  the dr. trentreker Worldwide Web Jihad Design (WWJD) package blasts mediocrity back to the shithole country where it came from.

    best of all, every WWJD website helps make the world freer from fascist extremists.  won’t you please help little johnny live fascist free?  it only costs $7 a day.  your love will make a huge difference in the life of one innocent child.  please act now.

    • WWJD RESEARCH AND ANALYSIS

    • WEBSITE ARCHITECTURE DESIGN AND DEVELOPMENT

    • COPY/TEXT CONTENT CREATION AND EDITING

    • GRAPHIC DESIGN CONTENT CREATION AND EDITING

    • WEB HOST AND EMAIL ACCOUNT SETUP

    • USER INTERFACE AND WEBSITE FUNCTIONALITY/QUALITY ASSURANCE TESTING

    • GOOGLE ADS PROMOTION DESIGN AND MANAGEMENT

    venture package:  promote

    crescent city blues & bbq festival / white gold

    posters?  postcards?  magazine ads?  street and sidewalk signs?  billboards?  google ads?  need a marketing plan?  maybe t-shirts?  what about employee neck tattoos of your company logo?  ka-BLAMMO!™  i’m your bomb maker.  dr. trentreker’s patented Pleasure Introduction of Limited Liability (PILL) package is the world domination industry’s favorite public indoctrination strategy.  everybody knows that.

    start making people do what you say. . . . TODAY!

    • PILL RESEARCH AND ANALYSIS

    • PRINTER QUALITY ASSURANCE AND PRINT MANAGEMENT

    • GRAPHIC DESIGN OF PROMO MATERIALS

    • INDOOR AND OUTDOOR SIGNAGE AND BANNER DESIGN, MANUFACTURE AND INSTALLATION

    • GOOGLE ADS DESIGN, DEVELOPMENT AND IMPLEMENTATION

    venture package:  eat/drink/dance

    can't do world domination if you're hungry

    opening a new cafe or bar & grille?  nightclub or uppity eatery?  just bought the local quicky mart?  need to update a tired logo or street signage created 20 years ago by cousin billy bob’s friend’s uncle?  where oh where do you turn?

    GOOD NEWS!  the dr. trentreker Attention Diverted by Happy Directives (ADHD) package will increase your financial girth like ten thousand late night snacks of peace and quiet will increase your belly.

    since my first job as a dishwasher in high school, i’ve worked in and managed bars, restaurants and clubs from beverly hills to bourbon street, yellowstone park to waikiki.  i’ve seen everything and i know what you’re going through.  it’s obvious i enjoy a good time but serving folks is serious business.  i’m here to help.

    • ADHD RESEARCH AND ANALYSIS

    • MENU CONTENT EDITING

    • MENU GRAPHIC DESIGN AND REVISIONS

    • P.O.S. USER NAVIGATION CONSULTING

    • INDOOR AND OUTDOOR SIGNAGE, BANNER AND/OR SPECIAL ARCHITECTURAL ART DESIGN, MANUFACTURE AND INSTALLATION

    • PRINT, WEB, EMAIL SETUP AND MANAGEMENT

    • CONSULTING FOR BRANDED CLOTHING, INTERIOR, ART AND SOUND DESIGN EXPERIENCES

    venture package: 

    sound-n-vision

    producing a film?  run a funky youtube channel you want to sear into the consciousness of humanity?  struggling to get your great stuff noticed?

    GOOD NEWS!  WORLD DOMINATION AWAITS!  the dr. trentreker Multisensory Overload Mystery (MOM) package (it’s WOW upside down!) is exactly what you need to illuminate your project from the myopic masses of video making mediocrity.

    awaken the enlightenment already within you with a MOM package.  only your halfassed labor stops you.

    • MOM RESEARCH AND ANALYSIS

    • film/video storyboard development

    • song/sound design

    • film/video graphics creation

    • stage/set/location design

    • lighting and sound installation

    • sound and video recording, editing

    • lots of adobe premiering and after effectsing

    • publication and promotion

    venture package: 

    serious author

    mysterious hipster shakespeare
    rustymetric#1 staff page

    yep.   got that goin’ for me, too.

    writing assignments accepted under the notoriously infamous Gonz-Ohmm Poet (GOP) package.  for the uninitiated, it goes like this:  i write whatever i frickin’ feel like.  will also accept gonzo journalism in foreign countries with large advances preferred.  war zone?  no prob.  been dead before.  all good.

    somebody else does robotic corporate clickbait crap.  they’re waiting for your ping at starbucks right now.

    • email from corporate magazine guy

    • deadline agreed to so far in advance i got this

    • $20,000 deposited into my cashapp

    • let’s see what knoxville offers in coke and hookers

    • with one special lady, places are traveled to (void if war zone / then it’s gruesome articles and dramatic death as a typewriter-toting samurai viking)

    • somebody important gets interviewed

    • by “interviewed” i mean whatever some senator or amazon executive vacationing in cancun says, thinking i’m all ’bout unregulated capitalism while they’re drunk next to my upside down phone that’s accidentally recording (hooker from knoxville is instrumental in making drunken confidential talks happen for some reason) as we joke about world domination.

    • alligators wrestled

    • published in the atlantic or mother jones or something

    • pulitzer & nobel prizes awarded

    • $20,000 deposited again into my cashapp

    • hooker writes bestselling memoir, takes me out to trejo’s tacos

    venture package: 

    world domination

    anne monde le veut for world domination

    do you have the need to accomplish something not easily categorized?  something enormous in personal scope but not prison-in-turkey illegal?  200 grand burning a hole in your pocket?  GOOD NEWS!  step right this way and be regaled with the amazing benefits of dr. trentreker’s Outrageous and Overwhelming Promotional Stunts (OOPS) package.  you know, deep inside. . . . it’s this or suicide.  so come on!  turn that frown into clowns!

    kill your self, the zen monk demands!  learn what the fuck that means.  and MORE!

    who wants to write a killer memoir in ten years?  YOU DO!

    • OOPS RESEARCH AND ANALYSIS

    • SWEEPING BLOOD OATHS SIGNED IN NEW ORLEANS, MAYBE VEGAS

    • unbelievable experiences in the yucatan, tangier, bangkok and probably india

    • techniques d’évasion de l’autorité française

    • ox, shark and stripper training

    • zen monkery

    • your realization of WORLD DOMINATION

    • MUAH HA HA HA HAAAA

    yamaha xs650 freedom or death machine chopper
    master suzuki

    REACH OUT:

    let’s talk about anti-imperialist plans abolishing fascism and neoliberalism to benefit all sentient beings.

    ring ring!  ring ring!

    504/339.4918

    2 + 9 =

    top secret lair

    185 jb lane

    sharps chapel, tn  37866

    open hours

    M – F:  10am – 6pm (eastern time)

    S – S:  whatever i feel like

    Email

    world.domination@trentreker.com